Mark Giacomin , I don't write horror stuff, but I think this is intriguing.

After a gang attack that prevents her from being at her mother's deathbed, a middle-aged woman first seeks therapy, then vengeance, while pursued by both gang and a police detective. Interesting. However, the gang better have a BIG reason for attacking her because, if it's just a random attack, they wouldn't pursue her. It's doubtful she would recognize them, and thrill-beatings are only thrilling when victims aren't on guard and probably armed, even if it's a hat-pin not a magnum. So, what's the attack motivation? Motive can be robbery, but why pursue a broke person? Also, there better be a strong reason the failed therapy transforms her into a vigilante .... It's a BIG leap from a "gentle" middle-aged person to vengeance plotter. Did the police fail her, too? Kinda slim, as is dying mother.... we all die alone even in a crowded room. Now, a retired MI6 agent taking a beat-down by the Russian oligarchs, and the mother being murdered in the hospital after a routine colonoscopy .... there's some good reasons why your heroine might be more than upset. And, if the cop was her ex-husband who is involved wit the oligarchs, well, I'd be pissed off enough to track 'em all down and kill 'em. It depends on how mean the bad guys are .. and who the milkman is. Does the heroine have a thing for 2% chocolate milk?

Thanks Robin Gregory.

Hi Jenean McBrearty, thanks for your interesting comments. It's tricky, there's only so much I can get into the logline without making it cumbersome and trying to convey a sense of the script. There is an initial altercation with two of the gang members over something minor, which results in the protagonist being hurt and leads to her losing her job (she is a milkman - her boss is old-fashioned, plus 'Maniac Milkwoman' sounds less catchy). She then has trouble finding the right kind of job. She was working part-time in the morning, a carer would look after the mother until she came home from work. She meets up with her ex-colleagues for drinks, but after she leaves them she spots the two gang members who attacked her, judgement blurred by alcohol, she follows them and decides to intimidate them like they did her, unfortunately for her the other gang members turn up, end result she comes to in hospital, can't remember her name. Rain lashing on the window sparks her memory and she rushes off home. The mother was not on her deathbed, but was showing early signs of dementia and was physically fragile hence the care, she passes away as she fell out of bed and had been alone for three days. I have pondered the use of 'gentle' as I agree it would be a leap if a couple of weeks later she turns into a killing machine, but I left it in as a contrast and there is a period of time before the revenge starts in earnest because she has to prepare. There is a very strong reason relating to the therapy, you'll have to trust me, it works. The gang doesn't realise it is her at first and neither do the police because they think it may be someone trying to start a turf war. I guess I could add into the logline that her job is milkman but thought it detracted from losing her mother.

Hi. This is why a synopsis is absolutely necessary. If you're going to submit to producers or agents or publishers. the log-line isn't a substitute for the synopsis. Log-line: An altercation with gang members turns a middle-aged woman's life upside-down and sends her into therapy that transforms into a vigilante. Now the synopsis: .... a summary of what you wrote above wherein you fill in the important details. WHAT was the initial (precipitating event) conflict about? Even if seemingly irrelevant, it snowballs into disaster. THAT'S a good story in itself: little things can become huge things for ordinary people who deliver milk. (Set pre-1970, I hope; few people got their milk delivered after that.)