One thing I wish someone had told me at the start of my career? How to network.
For me, networking always felt cringe. Fake. Like I had to ask for something from someone I barely knew or pretend to be someone I wasn’t just to get ahead.
But networking isn’t about that at all.
Networking is about building relationships.
And if you don’t trust yourself, building relationships gets harder. Every interaction starts feeling like a test—like you have to prove your worth instead of just having a conversation. You focus so much on saying the right thing that you forget to actually connect.
When networking becomes “how can I sell myself?” instead of “how can I connect?”—it feels transactional. Forced. Unenjoyable for both sides.
Here’s how to shift networking from a sales pitch to a real connection:
Not: “Hey, can you hire me?”
Instead: “I love what you do. How did you get started?”
Not: “Here’s my resume, let me know if anything opens up.”
Instead: “I’m always looking to collaborate with great people. What skills or expertise do you value most in your projects?”
Not: “I need something from you.”
Instead: “Let’s talk shop and see where our paths might cross.”
Next time you’re at an event, in a meeting, on a Zoom call, or in the DMs—trust yourself to just have the conversation.
Be interested, not interesting.
Be curious.
Learn something.
Play the long game - genuinely.
The opportunities come from there.
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Love this.
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Great advice, Hanan Abdelaal! I see networking as building relationships/getting to know people/making friends, and the opportunities to talk about scripts, jobs, etc. come up later on without me having to mention them. Sometimes it takes a day, days, weeks, or more, but treating networking that way works.
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Finally, words of wisdom!!! All true.
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Jill Godley glad it was helpful.
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Lindbergh E Hollingsworth Appreciate it. What has your experience been like?
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Maurice Vaughan spot on! thanks for sharing.
You're welcome, Hanan Abdelaal.
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That is so true. I am now in the process of shifting my career back to films and going through the initial phase of networking. As an introvert, building relationships has always been hard, but the idea that I had to sell myself and impress everyone to get a job made it even worse. Now that I’m older, I feel that I 100% prefer to connect rather than treat it as a business transaction.
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Hanan, having come from the studios, I'm not shy about asking for insights, assistance, experience in dealing with such and such. It's a relationship(s) where we can share info, or make a call, or referral ... just did it recently with an exec at one studio whom provided me a name/number to an exec at another studio. She said I could also use her name! Talked with the new exec and two scripts were submitted. Relationships take time to build, and these relationships can open doors!
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Fernanda Portela I feel that! The shift to connecting instead of selling makes such a difference...especially in an industry where relationships matter just as much as the work. Would love to hear more about your transition back to film. What’s been the most exciting (or challenging) part so far?
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Lindbergh E Hollingsworth Absolutely! Relationships are everything in this industry, and the right connections can make all the difference.
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Yes, that comes with age)
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Thsi is a helpful reminder. I really just try to be interested in the other person and trust something will come of that one way or another
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Hanan Abdelaal thx for the interest, i'm still struggling actually. i started again going to sets workings as a script supervisor to get in touch with the director and presenting myself as an editor. thats how i got the last 3 short films i've edited! But to me the most challenging part is getting to know people, I don't really now how to do this, I have plan this year to go to more festivals and trying to meet people but i'm not sure how to approach them
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Love this Hanan Abdelaal. I also think it comes with maturity. I prefer to connect with different people for different reasons but I'm also in a place where I want more "real" connections.
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I'm happy to read this post as I've been there (and still am). But I've become more selective of late, way more selective. Every connection requires mutual level of interest for it to happen. After nearly a decade I learnt the ugly truth about the film in industry here, in Singapore; it's a freezing cold industry where 99% of the people you meet will just use you and will never become a true connection. I was there whenever they asked,. Years later, when the time came and I asked for one single thing, to read my Pitch Deck, (not even the Screenplay) was where the ghosting started...
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Leonidas Stanescu You’re definitely not alone in that experience. The film industry—anywhere—is a tough space to navigate when it comes to real connections vs. transactional ones. Learning to be more selective is huge. It’s not about closing yourself off, it’s about recognizing where your energy is actually valued. Sounds like you’ve already made that shift, and that’s powerful.
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Leonardo Ramirez Absolutely! With time, you start valuing depth over quantity. It’s less about just knowing people and more about truly connecting with the right ones. Real > surface-level any day.
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Alexandra Stevens Yes! Genuine curiosity and connection always lead somewhere, even if it’s not immediate. Trusting that the right opportunities come from real relationships makes networking feel way less transactional.