A widowed father and his son move to a small town to escape a shadowy past but get more than they bargained for in this spoof of Hallmark and Lifetime movies.

SYNOPSIS:

Not Without My Jordans: A Basketball Father's Nightmare: A Life/mark Movie is a hilarious send up of the Hallmark and Lifetime style films, but with gender norms turned on their ear.

A widower and his teenaged son return to their hometown for a fresh start. The new

house is a fixer-upper. The father, Jerome, works from home as an influential film critic who sends

his work back to NYC; the son Jay is a star basketball player but is secretly a huge nerd. On the first

day of school, Jerome drops off Jay and heads to the hardware store to get supplies, where he

meets Chris, an attractive handywoman whom he begins to fall for as she helps him fix the house. At

school, Jay observes the different cliques and wants to hang with the nerds, but is pushed to the

basketball team jocks because he’s the star player. All the while, he’s pining for a nerdy girl, Ripley,

whom he can’t approach. After an altercation between the fathers at the Annual Neighborhood Wing

Cook-Off at a player’s house, Jerome and Jay are ostracized by most of the other basketball

fathers/players. Unknown to both, they are both being stalked by a shadowy figure watching from a

sedan parked nearby.

In spite of bullying by the nerds - and some bad advice about sending Ripley partial nudes (which

end up all over the school), Jay manages to make progress with Ripley. At the big game, Jay invites

Ripley over to check out his collection of cameras, which she accepts even after some taunting by

the nerd crew. Meanwhile, Jerome and Chris grow closer, and eventually run into his stalker in the

Home Depot. Stalker makes a thinly veiled threat toward Jerome, and gets closer to her prey by

renting the basement apartment in the house of another player on the high school team. We learn

that her whole issue actually centers around Jerome giving her independent film a bad review. Back

at Jerome’s, Chris and Jay have worked all day on a project, and they end up spending the night

together. Jay is upset and confused when Chris comes down to breakfast the next morning in a

beater and boxers.

After a father-son quarrel, Jerome comes home that afternoon to find “Your son is a SLUT” spray

painted on the garage door. The mean basketball dads are standing across the street and are

clearly responsible; one is especially aggressive and they end up fighting. Chris shows up at the end

of the fight and patches up Jerome’s eye before he leaves on a car trip to NYC. Jay comes back

from practice and Chris does emotional patching by showing him a surprise: a camera/film room for

all his nerdery. They bond. He’s no longer mad at his dad but they haven’t spoken yet. He invites

Ripley to see the surprise, but Stalker also shows up, takes them hostage, and makes him text his

dad to come home immediately. Stalker tortures the kids by tying them up and making them watch

her horrible movie. Stalker’s landlord shows up and gets knocked out by the Stalker right before

Jerome comes home and gets tied up too. Chris shows up and she and Stalker have an epic battle

involving chainsaws and tools from Chris’ collection. Stalker is knocked out but not completely dead.

Chris goes to free Jay, Ripley, and Jerome. The Stalker escapes but is immediately run over by the

Mean Dads who are drunk in an SUV on their way back from a party. Jay and Chris are shown

happily together as Jay and Ripley head off to prom together.