THE STAGE 32 LOGLINES
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RISK CAPITAL
By Barry Staff
A young truant unwittingly befriends a hitman who's on a contract in town, and together must face shady pasts in a deadly present.
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Hi Barry, great start, sounds more like the beginning of a premise right now, though. Loglines need to get specific. I often see writers make their second line mysterious like that. Don't. Be clear. This formula helps: When [INCITING INCIDENT OCCURS], a [SPECIFIC PROTAGONIST] must [OBJECTIVE],or else [STAKES].