THE STAGE 32 LOGLINES

Post your loglines. Get and give feedback.

FORGOTTEN BLOOD QUEEN

FORGOTTEN BLOOD QUEEN
By Alex Molly

GENRE: Fantasy, Adventure
LOGLINE: Betrayed by her own blood and forgotten by her kingdom, the Crimson Queen awakens in a world of steel and skyscrapers. Between a ruthless billionaire who wants to protect her and a dark sister who wants her head, a silver moon is rising. The throne was stolen, but the revenge will be eternal

SYNOPSIS:

Betrayed by her own blood and forgotten by her kingdom, the Crimson Queen awakens in a world of steel and skyscrapers. Between a ruthless billionaire who wants to protect her and a dark sister who wants her head, a silver moon is rising. The throne was stolen, but the revenge will be eternal

Sijun Cui

Rated this logline

Marcos Fizzotti

Rated this logline

Michelle Rojas

Rated this logline

Sandra Correia

Rated this logline

Nate Rymer

Rated this logline

Am Zain

Rated this logline

Am Zain

Amazing idea

Ail Milke

Rated this logline

Ail Milke

Your novel is very creative and evolution and I like it you are so talent

Karen "Kay" Ross

Rated this logline

Karen "Kay" Ross

Such a strong concept! You had me for the first two lines, and then it turned too cryptic. "silver moon is rising" isn't definitive enough, so I would suggest completing the equation of Protective Billiionaire + Murderous Sister - where will their big battle be? How will they fight (i.e. physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, etc.)? "The throne was stolen, but the revenge will be eternal" - okay, you can kind of get away with this as an end tagline, but I would consider using the SYNOPSIS section to write out the basic premise of your story, as if the blurb on the back of your book, so that we get all of these little details. This should include WORLD (like why is him being a Billionaire important?), MC's Strength & Flaw (we don't know either from your current description), MC's Want & Need (I can only assume she wants revenge but needs to get her throne back? If that's true, consider highlighting a secondary relationship - I'm assuming there is a romantic one with the Billionaire - so she has something to fight FOR not just fight AGAINST), and STAKES (universally we get it, but with what you have, we don't know WHO is more important to her, so we don't know what is PERSONALLY at stake - and personal stakes are always the most compelling).

Kevin Lenoble

Rated this logline

Kakha Beridze

Rated this logline

register for stage 32 Register / Log In