THE STAGE 32 LOGLINES
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THE LEVIATHAN
By Marcel Jr.
After a woman is ritually murdered on Albany’s outskirts, a haunted detective back from leave battles to hunt a twisted zealot before the body count rises.
SYNOPSIS:
Pilot (Episode I): "The Beginning of All Things"
A brutal, ritualistic murder in Albany, New York draws troubled detective Randall Shaw back into active duty after a prolonged leave. The victim, a former Marine, is found grotesquely staged in an abandoned brewery—marked with biblical scripture and religious symbols that suggest a killer driven by a warped sense of divine purpose.
Reluctantly joining the Special Investigation Unit, Randall partners with sharp, principled Detective Emma Markowicz and volatile Detective Barry Jenkins. As they investigate, Randall recognizes a disturbing pattern: the crime is not random, but part of a calculated ritual rooted in distorted Christian theology. To the killer, this is not murder—it is judgment.
The victim, Jennifer Griffin, becomes the first link in a growing chain connecting military trauma, buried scandals, and individuals marked by guilt. As evidence mounts, the team uncovers references to the Book of Job and the Leviathan—symbols of suffering, chaos, and divine testing—suggesting a larger design behind the killing.
As the case deepens, it forces each detective to confront their own inner fractures—Randall’s crisis of faith and grief, Emma’s moral certainty, and Barry’s unraveling personal life. When a cryptic package of annotated scripture arrives, it becomes clear the killer is not hiding, but communicating—guiding them toward his vision.
The investigation takes a personal turn when surveillance footage links the victim to a powerful tech CEO from Randall’s past, blurring the line between coincidence and conspiracy.
By the end of the pilot, one truth emerges: this is not an isolated crime, but the opening move in a larger, ideological crusade—one that will test the limits of faith, justice, and human morality.
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you should write at a hint of a resolution does he make it or not?
I haven't thought about that Kevin, thanks.
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I feel like you can leave out the emotionally damaged part because the killings reflect his traumatic past. It's like putting the same information in twice, but I'd definitely watch this.
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I like it. Very compelling. I do not think it is too long at all. Any longer, and yeah, it would have been. Great job in my opinion. I'd watch.
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Great logline!
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As we are rating the log line and not the story, the log line is a bit long. It could use some editing, for example: After a murder in a small community, a detective is assigned to apprehend the killer whose MO suggests all too familiar motives of a childhood trauma that demands resolution, too.
The synopsis needs editing also, for example: In the hospital waiting room, Barry watches news reports that include speculations about the case; Randall receives a phone call from the killer.
Your version: It's nighttime. We see what's left of the derelict Stone Brewing Co., situated on the border of the Mohawk River, in Colonie (Albany County); a once-proud center of Albany's finest brewery back in the day. In the lobby area, shrouded in darkness except for a few rays of sunlight, one of the windows is peculiarly tainted in red. A young woman, unidentified as of yet, is hanged in the center, wearing a white nightgown, with her intestines ripped from her stomach and blood running down her knees. Below her suspended feet (and on the right wall adjacent to her), religious symbols are drawn in blood. The scene makes one's skin crawl.
Edited version: The body of an unidentified woman is found hanging in the foyer of a now-defunct brewery, dressed in a white nightgown, blood dripping from a disembowelment. Below her, religious symbols are drawn in blood.Rated this logline
Jenean McBrearty I'll definitely take that into consideration. Thank you Jenean!
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I will defer to the people here with the constructive and fantastic feedback. As far as the story is concerned, I'm in. I didn't even finish the first full sentence of the teaser and I would have added this to my Netflix or Prime list. It's the dark side in me, I guess.
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I a;lways enjoy a murder mystery and this sounds like a good one. I agree with Jeanan that the synopsis may be a little too long.
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Certainly makes me want to know more.
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I'd definitely watch this, Marcel Jr.! I think the other thing your logline is missing is the stakes.
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