THE STAGE 32 LOGLINES

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THE BROTHERHOOD OF IT ALL

THE BROTHERHOOD OF IT ALL
By Trina Jackson

GENRE: Thriller
LOGLINE:

Kevin gets stood up at the altar from his so called fiancee' named Camille. Unfortunately, Camille's life becomes endangered and now she must run for her life!!!!!!

SYNOPSIS:

Kevin is an injury lawyer who is about to get married to the love of his life named Camille. Camille all of a sudden tells Kevin at the altar that she does not want to marry him. She walks off and Kevin is devasted. A year has passed since the so-called wedding and Kevin is in a much better place in his life. One night Kevin and his best friend Greg goes to a bar to hang out and all of a sudden, Greg tells Kevin that Camille has a new fiancee'. His name is Rashaad and he is in the bar with his friends drinking. When Kevin finds out that Camille has a new fiancee', he starts getting unhinged and everything else goes downhill after that. He eventally begins an affair with Camille's best friend named Yolanda but what she does not know is tht she is being used as bait for Kevin's plan on killing Camille and her new fiancee' Rashaad.

THE BROTHERHOOD OF IT ALL

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Maurice Vaughan

Hi, Trina Jackson. From the logline, I'm not sure who the protagonist is. Kevin or Camille.

Nate Rymer

Rated this logline

Trina Jackson

The protagonist is Camille the antagonist is kevin.

Maurice Vaughan

Ok, Trina Jackson. It sounds like Camille is the protagonist in the logline, but it sounds like Kevin is the protagonist in the synopsis.

I think your logline needs to be restructured. Something like: “After ______ (the inciting incident/the event that sets the plot in motion), a _______ (an adjective and the protagonist's position/role) tries to _______ (goal of story) so/in order to ________ (stakes).”

You can also put the inciting incident at the end of your logline: “A _______ (an adjective and the protagonist's position/role) tries to _______ (goal of story) so/in order to ________ (stakes) after ______ (the inciting incident/the event that sets the plot in motion).”

Tasha Lewis

Rated this logline

Arthur Charpentier

Rated this logline

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